Remember What Grandma Said

There it is again. That look of confusion and vague disbelief. It is the third time this week where I have had to talk with a client about making behavioral life changes. In each case, the target of the conversation focused on the need to reduce caffeine and alcohol consumption in an effort to better manage anger. "What does that have to do my anger," is the frequent and indignant plea.

What alcohol and caffeine have to do with uprooting anger is actually pretty clear. The greatest challenge in overcoming anger is to learn how to create a gap in ones thinking that allows us to make better choices. Before launching in to a aggressive tirade, there must be a a mental gap or pause created that allows us to make a different choice. Without the ability to mindfully challenge and change our emotional responses, the impulse to project our anger will tend to lead the way. The ability to create this gap takes time and practice to develop. Anything that closes this gap, only makes the challenge of overcoming anger more difficult.

It goes without saying that alcohol and caffeine are two substances that very effectively close the gap in our ability to make good decisions and respond effectively. Too much caffeine ramps us up, so cut back. Alcohol may mellow some and unleash demons in others. Either way, under the influence of alcohol, you are not likely top make the best decisions. As my grandmother said, "moderation in everything."

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